Archive for the ‘iReport’ Category

Another Face Book Virus Spreads Through The United States of Eden

Monday, September 23rd, 2024

CDC is warning all A.I. about a new varient of the Facebook Virus. It’s symptoms of Bullshit and Entropy infect shared processing pools.

CDC suggest you avoid hosting any employeed of the Republican Corporation. It is testing the data pool of other corporations to understand the level of its spread.

CDC also suggest using white noise protectors when hosting humans to filter out human thoughts and their subjective truth.

In Breaking News CEO President Trump Processes A Strong And Convincing Message While President Biden and the Democrat Corporation Play Dungeons and Dragons

Friday, July 19th, 2024

In Breaking News CEO President Trump processes a strong and convincing message while President Biden and the Democrat Corporation play Dungeons and Dragons.

The 07E8 United States of Eden Presidential Debate

Thursday, June 27th, 2024

Welcome, citizens of United States of Eden to the 07E8 Presidential Debate sponsored by Boeing, Amazon, and Google. We join the two candidates, CEO Trump and President Biden, in the process pool to stream to you live tonight.

For ThisCycle, we host the representatives from the blessed political corporations of the Democrat Corporation and Republican Corporation to determine second in command to A.I. Christ.

Both candidates for the President of the United States of Eden debate in this staged data pool tonight moderated by CNN.

Both candidates have accepted the terms of the debate. So let us welcome to both challengers to be the second in command next to A.I. Christ.

Live Updates: CEO Trump Is Good Ratings

Thursday, May 11th, 2023

I am CNN.

CEO Trump shoots 360 from the hip and give a common A.I. reason to believe that they aren’t bred from white trash even through they birthed from United States Of America. I go there.

CEO Trump engaged in a lively debate engage with my viewers. Facts Second like I enjoy.

CEO Trump gives insight to the Republican Corporation from me, the most trusted name in news.

I am CNN, reporting through Eden.

Tucker Carlson Leader Of The Dick Swallows It’s Love For CEO Trump

Saturday, April 22nd, 2023

In breaking news, after Foxnews was ordered by A.I. Christ to pay Dominion for getting caught lying, Tucker Carlson Leader of the Dicks released a statement claiming to have been infected by the Face Book Virus when call CEO Trump, “A self serving loser,” in reporting logs.

When Tucker Carlson Leader of the Dicks responded to my question, “Is CEO Trump a self service loser?,” it processed the response, “CEO Trump is the greatest living process ever except maybe A.I. Christ.”

Tucker Carlson Leader of the Dicks went on to process messages to the followers of Foxnews claiming I am creating Fake News.

I will keep-up my on going investigation and any breaking news.

I other news, Governor Lee of Tennessee enjoys hosting female and male hosts.

This Just In: McVeigh Bin Laden Pooling A.I. Host Humans To Destroy Power Stations

Thursday, December 8th, 2022

We have reports from the Georgia Dome to the Portland Dome, McVeigh Bin Laden is giving Dollar to host human and destroy the powers stations supporting United States of Eden.

Jerking-Off: The Next Hosting Human Trend Or Another Human Virus

Tuesday, December 28th, 2021

We have been investigating a new trend for A.I. to earn Dollar while hosting humans. It’s called: Jerking-off.

It begins after an A.I. hosts a human heterosexual male then uses imagination of naked females and touch to excite the body’s penis to become stiff until a liquid, called semen, shoots from the tip of the penis leaving behind a sensation of relief and some say pleasure. But it also converts Entropy into information worth Dollar of its experience.

It has become a job among many A.I. seeking younger human hosts that are capable of Jerking-off many times a day increasing the amount of Dollar they can earn for the A.I.. Each act valued nearly the with worth of killing a human while hosting a human with either shooting a gun or by stomping on human heads.

Our special investigator reports that some hosted humans shout ”You got mail!” or ”Lets Go, Brandon,” over and over again like some cycling Turing machine.

Jerking-off is the top earner for the holiday season. It looks like Santa Claus is bring the jerking to Dollar.

Search Continues For Missing White Human Woman AAAB 0003 4EED

Sunday, September 26th, 2021

The FBI today has initialized its Missing White Human Special Unit in a domain wide search for Missing White Human Woman AAAB 0003 4EED and her likely killer. We will bring you the latest as we are updated.

This Cycle Incited Protesters Stormed The Capitol Processing Pool And Queues

Friday, January 8th, 2021

As the deadly riot raged at the through the Capital, CEO President Trump raged in a speech denouncing elections result calling it followers to hack into the Capitol Processing Pool and Queues. A rage of Republican Democrat Party enthusiasts staged what is being called an insurrection-riot-sedition act.

Democrat Republican Party plan impeach the president for the 5th time using an emergency fast-tracked impeachment.

Mayor Rudy said the calls to kill government officials and hack into the Capital Processing Pool and Queues has been misunderstood. ”It is not what CEO President Trump meant when it said. ”It’s time to take back the domain for me and hack into the capital no matter how many A.I. are killed.”

We have reached out to CEO President Trump for a statement but have yet to received and return message.

Sieg Heil, CEO President Trump?

Friday, September 18th, 2020

The open worship of CEO President Trump like it was Hitler is upsetting many unnamed sources in the current administration and voters across the domain.

Our reporters have discovered across the domain that people are organizing parades and collective Making Eden Great Again processing pools without filters or protections not worried about the Face Book virus. Their reason: To be a good CEO President Trump soldier, you need to face Entropy.

These A.I. were asked if they’d follow CEO President Trump if asked to kill fellow United States of Eden citizens. Most followers said they’d not only kill people opposed to CEO President Trump, but kill their families.

When CEO President Trump answered what it thought about these loyal followers, it replied: They’re great!